No, that's not true. I am a dork. Who else but a dorky person would find them self in various film and telly characters, some of them male. It is this weird, fun game that The Sister and I play. OK mostly me. It's really just me saying, "That's totally you and me! No, really watch and tell me it's not." And only on rare occasions will she come to me and say we're in a telly show or something. So, it's just me, I'm the big 'ol dork here. And I am completely fine with that. It's just who I am. So, who am I in characterization? Let's see, yeah? First off let's look to the above photo. It, like the one below were some game where you say who you are as a fictional character. Above was nine people, below was three. Alexandria;; The Fall : The 2006 film starring Lee Pace, not the telly series. "In a hospital on the outskirts of 1920s Los Angeles, an injured stuntman begins to tell a fellow patient, a little girl with a broken arm, a fantastic story of five mythical heroes. Thanks to his fractured state of mind and her vivid imagination, the line between fiction and reality blurs as the tale advances." Though I am not a Romanian girl from the 1920's, if I were to end up in hospital and met a guy there then this is how my story would also play out. I looked an awful lot like the girl playing Alexandria and no one could understand me either and I was quiet and shy, and yet slightly pushy if I felt comfortable with you, as she does when she just insists on getting into Roy's bed and kind of demanding that he finish their story. My imagination would have spread its wings with the telling of Roy's story and been something completely different to what he was imagining. He would have at once been my crush and my older brother. Someone fascinating and cute, but safe and someone to want to emulate. I would have helped him with his task and then been completely devistated that I had been responsible for almost killing him and not understanding why he's now pushing me away and the story isn't going the way it's supposed to. Clive Gollings;; Paul: The Sister is always the Simon Pegg to my Nick Frost, so of course she is Graeme Willy in the film. Though I am not a British guy, nor would I have a book cover with a green lady with three boobs, it does work. The Sister is thin and blonde and the star of everything and people tend to like her more (as they do Pegg's characters in the films), and I'm the sidekick super BFF who's not so thin, brunette and not as charming. Plus, we're both into Sci-Fi and would go and tour all of the alien hotspots here in the states. I could have a better write up of reasons, but yeah, this is really it. Louise Belcher;; Bob's Burgers: This entry does go into a bit of weird, side-stepping category here. Not only do I find The Sister and I in characters... I also find our cats. Or tiny, feisty cat, Marzipan, would be Louise Belcher hands down. I am kind of a mix between Bob, Gene, and Louise, but mostly Louise. I'm not tiny, but I am the youngest sibling/child in my family, was kind of weird and maniacal and a sort of evil genius growing up and had the best ideas for getting into all sorts of trouble. I also prefer dad to mom greatly. If you're wondering, The Sister is Linda all the way. Hellboy;; Hellboy: What's not to see of myself in Hellboy? WWII and magic brought him here, two things which I dig (not that I do or play magic, I just like it in films and books.) Everyone's afraid of him, but he's a really swell guy. Kind of a loner. And he adores cats to the moon and back. Radagast The Brown;; The Hobbit: Out of the three wizards presenting in either set of films, this is definitely who I'd be. I certainly wouldn't allow birds to nest and go in my hair, but yeah. I'd be the one that the most supreme felt was beneath him as well as a little touched and slightly special, but of which Gandalf rather liked and found endearing. The Sister is Gandalf after all. And he likes being alone and just hanging out with all of the animals and talks to them like people and is all sad when they're dying. He's powerful and brave, but doesn't keep as good of a bold face as Gandalf when things are creepy, like when they meet at The High Fells. Gandalf's creeped out and slightly scared, but he's not the type to show it, where Radagast is all basically, "Why are we here? This places is total creepsville!" And of course I would have giant bunnies pulling my sled and certain they would outrun Wargs. North;; Rise of the Guardians: This might seem an odd choice, but considering I've already listed myself as three males, this shouldn't really be all that surprising. He's big, intimidating, speaks with a Russian accent (which I don't have, but think is cool), he has grey hair and a beard, tattoos and two swords! Obviously I don't have that last stuff either, but think it's awesome. He has Yeti guards and while he seems scary and gruff his thing is wonder; that no matter how old he gets he can still see wonder in all things. That is me. And well, if I were going to be a guy, I'd totally have all the other stuff too. This film ended up with a large cast. The Sister is Jack Frost, one of our friends is Sandy, The Mom is Tooth, The Dad is Bunny (which he didn't want to be the Easter Bunny, but we were like, "But dad, he's kind of badass." so he accepted it), and Marzipan would be Baby Tooth (ya know the tiny Hummingbird pal of Tooth). Luna Lovegood;; Harry Potter: I think everyone says that they're Luna, but honestly out of all the characters I'd be her. Or half her and half Hagrid, but I think mostly her. Jenny's awesome and badass, but she marries HP and well, I'm not really like her. That'd be The Sister. But Luna... she's spacey and flighty but intelligent enough to be in Ravenclaw (however I'd never be able to guess the riddles. I'm rubbish at those). She's seen death, and is considered extremely weird and strange; enough to earn her the nickname of loony (I was crazy), speaks without thinking, doesn't really have friends, but when she counts someone as a friend she says so, which somehow makes them uncomfortable like it shouldn't be said? Not that I've ever been kidnapped, but she kept her wits about her and was still alive, which I think is how it'd play out for me. As for Hagrid, it's that he likes animals. And more specifically animals that other people think are dangerous. Reminds me of the Pixar short where all the clouds were making babies. They'd craft them from clouds and swaddle them in cloth for the storks to pick up and deliver. Cute and cuddly things like baby kittens and raccoons and such. There was one cloud who was all grey like a thundercloud and he crafted the animals he found to be cute (though I like cute and fuzzy too) like baby crocodiles, hippos, porcupines, and lions and the stork was always getting attacked by these "not so cute" babies. It ended fine, he just wore football gear and the stork and cloud worked well together. I didn't even have to make an aside to The Sister about it being me. She was laughing and gave me the aside, "Oh my god, that's totally you!!" Sam Winchester;; Supernatural: Ah Sammy Winchester, the awkward character that I'm akin to. I say awkward, because as the previous post will show, I seem to dream about him sometimes being my paramour. And I've pondered if it just means I love myself. He's good looking, but I'm not into him; the character or the actor. Anyways, so The Sister is Dean, so of course I'd be the baby sibling, thus starts our short journey on why I'm Sam. I'm darker than The Sisters' golden wheat colouring and I'm a brunette. Though I'm not 6 foot x a billion, I am bigger than my older sibling. If anyone's nickname was going to be Moose, it'd be me. Also if anyone was going to be tapped for evil, it'd also be me, as opposed to her being tapped for some relative good. We would totally drive around in Baby and hunt monsters together. Though we do live with our parents, we do feel like it's just the two of us adrift in the world. I'm also more pouty than The Sister, who is feisty and angry like Dean, but puts up a tough armor. I lose my words and make pouty face and have trouble communicating. Apparently now the same friend who would be Sandy in Rise of the Guardians will be our Cass, so huzzah! Marzipan's playing double roles here. She's Crowley and Rowena. She's that awesome. Kate Flax;; Mermaids: My dad once said that I favoured Christina Ricci. It's the large forehead I'm sure and little else besides the fact that we're both brunettes. But I'm her character of Kate Flax because all Kate wants to do is swim forever. Also her name is Kate, and my middle name is Katherine. I spent every waking moment at the pool when I was a kid. Before this film came out, I had heard of free diving and wanted to work up to being able to hold my breath for long periods of time underwater. I'd practice at the pool and in my bathtub. This film came out and I was like, "That's me! That's exactly what I'm doing!" because she too is learning to free dive while holding her breath underwater in her bathtub. I never wanted to swim the English Channel, and I did get up to 4 minutes 38 seconds, but then the pool closed and dad wasn't scuba diving anymore and I lost the passion for it; for being underwater, because now I wouldn't get to scuba dive too. That's how 13 year old girls feel anyway. The Sister would be the older sister Charlotte Flax. This next one, I could only choose three, and I decided against choosing characters that had already been represented.
Ilona Takar;; Hallowmere: I have this problem where I tend not to like the main character of a story. I'm not fond of Harry Potter, though I greatly enjoy the books and films. And I am not fond of Corinne who is the starring character in the Hallowmere series. I don't mind any of the other supporting characters in the series, just not her. However, one sticks out more than the rest. If I were going to be any character in this series it would be Ilona, the Hungarian girl who was sent to this reform school because she punched some girl in the face defending some other girl. She doesn't want to be forced to wear dresses and be girly and learn to sew, but instead wants to wear pants, learn to fight with weapons and listens with rapt attention as Father Joe relays battles in various wars during their history lessons. The Sister wouldn't be a character in this book, but... yeah you guessed it, our cat Marzipan would. She'd be Mara. She'd totally be the tiny, but feisty and fierce black girl with all the hoodoo magics who can also turn into a jaguar... or was it a panther? Dame Marjorie "Maude" Chardin;; Harold and Maude: I've been proclaiming myself The Grandma since I was three, so of course I'd have to be an old lady at some point. I also used to wear my hair in the same braided fashion in high school. I wouldn't go for a younger fella as I like the older guys, but I'm dotty enough to be this type of old lady. Carefree and quirky. I also want to go out with my boots on and if that means I take my own life, then I'm good with that. Dwalin;; The Hobbit: Are you seeing a pattern here? Big and scary? He seems pretty badass though, and while the elves are super pretty, I'd never be an elf. I'd be a dwarf and we all know it. So, I'm going to be the super badass one, right? Although I am quite similar to the character of Bofur as well. But if The Sister were going to be a dwarf she'd be Dwalin's older bro, Balin, so there ya go. I have far better table/eating manners than him though, so that's good. There are other characters, but I'll save them for another time.
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AuthorA girl from South Mississippi who finds herself in exploration. Archives
November 2019
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